How to Be an Online Doofus

Want to be a Doofus?  Has it been your lifelong goal of annoying everybody online? Well here's a step by step guide that even you can get through:

Post "First" in a Comment Thread - oh wow, you're the first one to post a comment.  You could add value to the conversation, or even post a witty remark.  But you're a doofus so post the word "first".  This way, other doofus's will no that you are cool and the first one to post a comment.

Use Hotmail - Especially for your business email!  Why wouldn't you want to use hotmail - the Spam filter is so intelligent it knows you need a bigger...! And it will also treat you like a doofus, blocking every legitimate link in your email, preventing you from clicking recklessly.

Warn Others About A Facebook Hacker/Virus - It's your duty as a doofus to warn all of your contacts on Facebook that their is a potental virus/hacker on the loose that will destroy your computer if you don't forward this message to 20 other people (or hit the keys alt+F4).  You better warn everyone as its better to be safe than sorry, doofus.

Follow 20000 People on Twitter - And only post links to your blog.  Be warned, no-one (apart from other spammers doofuses) will follow you back.  So it will be like talking to yourself but not weird cos its online..right?

Winge - As a doofus it's your right to winge.  In fact you're legally bound to post negative comments on Digg, FriendFeed and complain about how.... "Techcrunch used to be cool".   Make sure your winging is narrow minded and you'd best use the word "gay" a couple of times per comment.

Post Pictures of Yourself Drinking - Now its time to prove to the world that your not only doofus but a manly doofus, by changing your avatars to pics of you drinking - mainly beer.  Add a screwed up facial expression and you've mastered the art of Doofus avatars.

There has to be more - post em in the comments to be added

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